


I'll Hold You Tight Until You're Alright

by ZombieliciousXIII



Series: Tumblr Requests! [37]
Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Depression, F/M, Fluff, POV Female Character, POV First Person, Suicide Attempt, Triggers, reader POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-02
Updated: 2016-02-02
Packaged: 2018-05-17 20:08:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5883892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZombieliciousXIII/pseuds/ZombieliciousXIII
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tumblr request: "If this is too triggering for you, you don't have to do it, but could you do either a Frank or Gerard fluff where you're about to kill yourself and he finds on the bathroom floor with everything and talks you out of it and it's gets hella fluffy afterwords. Once again, if this is too triggering you don't have to do it"</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Hold You Tight Until You're Alright

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry Sugar, I actually like doing these types of requests, not because of the macabre nature but because I want you all to know (if you're going through things or not) that someone out there loves you - me being one of them - and we don't need another star to fall, not ever. I'm always here for you, ALL of you, please remember that. I love you all so very much and I hope you guys enjoy this. xxoxoo
> 
> WARNING: TRIGGER(S) WARNING, SUICIDE ATTEMPT!

"Are you sure you're okay, babe?" Frank asks, his warm arms wrapped around your waist.

You force a small smile, "yeah I'm just...tired," you lie, the numbness has taken it's hold on you and you knew there was no escaping this - it was now or never. "I'm just going to go to sleep," you add, wrapping your arms around Frank's neck.

The hazel-eyed man smiles lovingly at you, dipping his head he kisses you softly. Frank was always so warm, so solid against you like a rock you knew you could always count on but you knew this would be better for you, for the  _both_ of you.

"I love you, (Y/N)," Frank says softly against your lips, you felt your eyes burn at the words.

Your throat felt dry but you spoke anyway, "I love you too, Frank," you reply, your voice just above a whisper hoping the slight rasp wouldn't give you away.

"I'll see you soon, do you want anything while I'm out?"

You shake your head, clearing your throat a little, "no, I'm okay, just say hi to the guys for me."

Frank smiles and nods, all too soon his arms left you and you suddenly felt cold, watching him leave the bedroom you composed yourself until the front door clicked shut and his car started. Falling down onto the bed you curl up, knees to your chest as a cry tears itself from your throat. Looking out the window you take in the sunset through your tears, knowing it would be the last time you'd see it and you revel in the mixture of pinks and blues swirling in with the pale white clouds. After a moment you wipe away the trails of dried tears on your cheeks, your other hand laying limp at your side when you feel a soft warmth lap over it, looking to your side you see Sweet Pea licking the top of your hand. You smile weakly, feeling a sad smile pull on your lips you gently pick up the mutt, holding the small dog to your chest and stroke it's head as Sweet Pea slowly licks at your face.

"I'm sorry, Pea," you whisper, kissing the dog's head. "Please take care of him for me..." you trail off, kissing the dog once more before setting the Sweet Pea down and move to stand.

The dogs follow you, each yelping and whining for your attention but you pressed forward, their cries make your heart ache but you knew this was something you had to do on your own. Opening your closet you lean down, lifting a pile of folded shirts and grab a neatly folded letter, Frank would understand, you weren't leaving him behind, this wasn't his fault. This was no one's choice but yours, you knew that and this letter would explain the same to him. Gently shooing the small pack of dogs away from the bathroom door you slip inside and lock it, trying to push their cries on the other side of the door to the back of your mind.

 _'This has to happen, it's for the best,_ ' you kept telling yourself, reaching into the medicine cabinet you grasp a small orange bottle.

The object almost felt wrong in your hands, the small voice of hope in you telling you not to do this, that this wasn't your only option. However, a larger,  _darker,_ part of you told you it was...that this was your only true escape. Uncapping the prescribed sleeping pills you look down at the white tablets, this was it. This was your last stand. Closing the cabinet door you look at your reflection, your red, puffy eyes, pale skin and you knew this wasn't you. This wasn't (Y/N). No, this person staring back at you wasn't the girl Frank met and fell in love with, not the person all your friends had turned to and confided in...this person needed to die.  _Needed_ to be stopped. You needed to be saved, and the only way that was possible was by killing the person staring back at you. It was all for the best - that's what you kept telling yourself as you snuffed out the last words of hope within you. Placing the letter onto the sink's countertop you grab the glass on the counter, filling it up from the sink you throw back five pills, downing it with the lukewarm tap water. Once they were gone, you repeated until the plastic bottle was empty. After a few moments you felt the pills kicking in, slight panic set in but you knew this was the only way things could go... _should_ go. Toppling toward the bath's surface you sit down and weakly bring your knees to your chest, resting your head on the tops of your knees. You could faintly hear the dogs outside whimpering and scratching at the door, your eyes brim with tears, they were like your children and you felt like you were betraying them somehow, the panic in their cries making your heart sink.

"I'm sorry," you whisper, voice raspy as black dos began dancing in your vision.

Suddenly, in the distance, you could hear a banging and a familiar voice shouting frantically. Your stomach turns to lead, nononono, he wasn't supposed to be home yet--

Frank burst through the bathroom door, breaking the barrier off it's hinges and drops to his knees, cupping your face.

"(Y/N), Fuck! Please,   _no!"_ Frank cries, voice miles away. "S-Stay with me, the man yells, help's on the--"

His voice mutes, your world spins and you topple forward against his solid chest. You weakly hold on, whimpering 'I'm sorry' until the words die on your tongue. Your cold shaking hands falling from him.

~~~~~

You wake up, body heavy and drained. Blinking your eyes open your eyes burn, you couldn't deny it, a small part of you was relieved. Weakly you turn your head, seeing Frank sitting on a chair beside you, his hands clutching yours in his sleep, head resting on the hospital mattress.

"F-Frank?" You call out, throat painfully dry.

The small man's eyes flutter open, large - normally so hopeful eyes - greet you, red and swollen. You felt your heart clench, this was  _your_ fault. The thought ate away at you.

"Shh," the small man hushes softly, sitting up his grip on your hand renewed. "Rest babe, you need rest."

"What happened?" You ask, your voice sounding foreign to you.

"You..." Frank trails, his voice cracking a little and he clears it before continuing. "You overdosed," he says quietly, his hand holding your almost painfully tight.

"They had to pump your stomach."

"How d-did you know?"

"I felt it...a horrible feeling took over and I had to turn back," Frank says softly, bringing your hand up to kiss the back of it. "I read the letter."

You flinch slightly at that knowledge, looking at Frank worriedly.

"You're not the  only one that feels this way, (Y/N)," he says slowly, voice not condescending but comforting. "I know everything seems like it's...grey, but it doesn't have to be I'll be beside you with every color of the fucking rainbow to paint it for you," you and Frank chuckle softly at his words, light hearted but hopeful.

"I'll show you that life isn't as bleak as you think it is, if you'll let me."

You turn a bit more, looking at Frank properly and smile - and for the first time in months, it wasn't forced.

"I'd love that, Frank...thank you," you reply, voice coming out a little scratchy with unshed tears.

Frank slowly stands and you shift over to one side of the bed, making room for him and smile slowly when he kicks off his shoes and climbs in next to you. His arms encircle you and you - not sure how you hadn't realised this before - felt like you were finally home. You look up at the hazel-eyed young man, slowly cupping his face you lean up and Frank meet you half way, your lips pressed to his felt like bliss. At that  moment, you couldn't understand why death seemed like an escape, when the man beside you was your heaven, your home, your soul mate. the kiss turned a little more desperate and you could feel Frank shaking a little, the tremble in his hands made your heart sink slightly.

Pulling back a little, you rest your forehead against his, "I'm not going anywhere, Frank...I promise, never again."

Frank sighs softly, his relief clear.

"I love you, (Y/N)...so much more than I could every express."

"I love you too, Frank, with my heart and soul."

The two of you fell asleep in each other's arms, and there was never a day that Frank left your side and for that you were thankful. After a week more visitors were allowed, and Gerard, Ray and Mikey didn't waste a moment to come see you, the trio brining balloons, flowers, and - possibly - the largest teddybear you'd ever seen. None of them questioned you, nor treated you any different than they ever had and you were grateful, grateful to continue to be seen as their little sister and best friend. When you were allowed to walk around the hospital grounds you asked Frank to bring the letter from home, at first he froze, apprehension clear on his face but you calmed his fears. So there you were, watching the letter burn on the hospital garden's floor, Frank's hand warm in yours. You knew then, never would you try something like that ever again, you had a long life to live and you intended to live it to the fullest, with Frank at your side of all of it.

 


End file.
